Divorce can be an extremely messy and unpleasant process for everyone involved, yet recent studies suggest that over 42 percent of marriages end in this way. Sadly, cleaning up the pieces from a failed marriage can cost a lot of money, time, and emotional energy if you're not prepared. Here are a few tips for coping with the process and making it as seamless as possible.
Hire a Divorce Attorney
The first thing you'll want to do is hire an attorney that specializes in family law. Your divorce attorney is there to handle all the legal paperwork, splitting of assets, and any other family law matters. All of these items will impact you financially, so you'll definitely want to do your research. Ask around for recommendations, compile a list of your top three candidates, and take the time to interview each of them separately before making your final selection. Enlisting legal help will save you a lot of time and stress throughout the journey.
Divorce can take its toll on your mental health, so its very important to pay attention to your emotional needs. There are plenty of counselors that specialize in failed marriage therapy and can assist you in the grieving and healing process. Similar to your divorce attorney, you'll want to research therapists in the area and take the time to meet with them for an interview before scheduling an official appointment. You'll be sharing some of your saddest moments and biggest shames with this person so you'll you feel completely comfortable with this person.
Minimize the Impact on the Kids
If you have children, you'll want to minimize their pain and guilt as much as possible. Children have a way of accepting the blame for situations that are out of their control, so you'll want to remind them as often as you that you love them regardless of the circumstances. Additionally, you'll want to remain as amicable as possible with your ex. Reserve arguments or heated conversations for when you have time alone and never say anything negative about your ex in front of the kids. These details allow your children to feel as normal as possible during this tumultuous time.
The last thing you want to do during this hard time is sit at home and dwell. It's completely natural to feel like never leaving the house again, but once you've made the decision to move forward, you should really actually move forward. Get involved in a new activity or hobby that will allow you to meet new people. You should also try to establish a weekly routine or schedule that will keep you occupied each day of the week. No matter where you decide to spend your time, it's important to maintain a support network rather than isolate yourself from the world. Get out there and explore!
Divorce is never a comfortable process. The decision impacts a lot of people and can be very difficult to accept. Regardless, it's important you continue moving forward by focusing on your physical and emotional health, building your support system, and exploring new activities. If you stay busy and focused, the storm will pass before you know it!
Anthony is an avid blogger from Tulsa, Oklahoma who is passionate about encouraging healthy family values for all communities while working with the Gorospe & Smith Tulsa Divorce Law Firm in his own community.
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